I met this girl named Corinna, she and I were talking about what we look for in people that we would consider as a future husband or wife. She said to me that she would not want to be with someone who already has kids because she wants to be the most important person in her husbands heart and she felt that if he already had kids with someone else that she would not be able to be that most important person. At the time that seemed like an odd idea that was obviously from someone who has not had kids. I thought this because the love I have for my kids is completely different than the love I felt for my ex-wife. However I felt like it was something that would already be difficult to explain to someone who's first language is English, let alone someone who speaks English as a second language. So I just left it alone and took it as her giving the hint that "I think your nice and would like to be friends with you, but I'm not interested in going any further than that."
Now that I've had a week to chew on that, I think she might be right. Right now the number one lady in my life is most definitely my daughter Chloe. I love her more than words can say and think about her all the time. So I wonder, is Corinna right? If I am fortunate enough to ever have another wife will she be number one in my heart next to my kiddos? or will she be the second most loved woman in my life. I don't know the answer to that. What I do know is that I don't want to be with someone who would be jealous of my kids, I want someone that would love me enough to know that the best way that they could show me that they love me is to love and want the best for what is most important in my life. That will always be my precious children, Chloe and Carson.
this wonderful life
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
I Wish Nothing But The Best For You
"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened' - Dr. Seuss
Monday, November 28, 2011
Happy Thanksgiving
There are a few things from this weekend that are sticking with me.
First thing is a few lbs. I ate really good this weekend thanks to my awesome friends Brandi and Wayne McCune. Wayne got up well before the sun did and started smoking a turkey and it was delicious. Brandi cooked lots of your other traditional thanksgiving foods including a way too tasty chocolate peanut butter cheesecake. Also I was introduced to an old favorite of mine that I had never had on turkey day before, cheesy macaroni and cheese! apparently it's a staple down south, who knew?
Later that night I got a ride home from a friend who I don't know real well but has always seemed like a very thoughtful and selfless person. On the ride home we talked about what I have been going through since last year at thanksgiving and she shared some of her past as well. She told me about how when she was married, her family that she married into did not like or support her at all. I felt thankful for the family that I married into, some of whom I still communicate with on Facebook and occasionally on Skype. They have let me know in words and deed that no matter what happens I will always be part of their family and for that I am very thankful.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Nobody said it was easy
Sunday, August 28, 2011
How I feel is nothing new. David felt the same way
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Notes on Fear
How to get rid of FEAR:
three antidotes to fear :truth, love, faith
FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real
There are 365 "fear nots" in the Bible
WHEN YOUR WORLD FALLS APART
The Invisible War – Part 7
Rick Warren
August 13-14, 2011
JEREMIAH’S LAMENTATION AGAINST GOD
1. ______unload all my frustration on God___________________________________________
“I am a man who has seen affliction, by the rod of his wrath. He has driven me away and made me walk in darkness
rather than light; he has turned his hand against me again and again, all day long. He has made my skin grow old
and broken my bones. He has surrounded me with bitterness and hardship. He has made me dwell in darkness like the
dead. He has walled me in so I cannot escape; he has weighed me down with chains. Even when I call out or cry for
help, he shuts out my prayer. He has barred my way with blocks of stone; he has made my paths crooked.”
Lamentation 3:1-10 (NIV)
2. _turn my focus from my pain to God's love__________________________________________________
“The thought of my pain and my homelessness is bitter poison. I think of it constantly, and my spirit is depressed.
Yet hope returns when I remem- ber this one thing: The Lord's unfailing love and mercy still continue, fresh as the
morning, as sure as the sunrise. The Lord is all I have, so in him I put my hope.”
Lamentation 3:19-26 (TEV)
“The Lord is merciful and will not reject us forever. He may bring us sorrow, but his love for us is sure and
strong. He takes no pleasure in causing us grief or pain.”
Lamentation 3:31-33 (TEV)
3. _____get alone with God and wait!
______________________________________________
“When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions.
Wait for hope to appear.”
Lamentation 3:28-29 (Mes)
“The Lord is good to everyone who trusts in him, so it is best for us to wait in patience—to wait for him to save
us.”
Lamentation 3:25-26 (TEV)
4. __Change the things I can change_______________________________________________
“Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord.”
Lamentation 3:40 (NIV)
5. _______Ask God to relieve my fears__________________________________________
“My enemies threw me into a pit and dropped stones on me. The water flowed above my head, and I cried out, ‘This is
the end!’ But I called on your name, Lord, from deep within the well, and you heard me! You listened to my
pleading; you heard my weeping! Yes, you came at my despairing cry and told me, ‘Do not fear!’”
Lamentation 3:53-57 (NLT)
6. expect Jesus to resore my life _________________________________________________
“Restore us, O Lord, and bring us back to you again! Give us back the joys we once had!”
Lamentation 5:21 (NLT)
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